


Wishful Thinking

by rainpuddles



Category: Genshiken
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-03-03
Updated: 2010-03-03
Packaged: 2017-10-07 17:12:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/67282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainpuddles/pseuds/rainpuddles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When the "right" thing to say is really not "right" at all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Wishful Thinking

**Author's Note:**

> Set at some point before Saki's graduation. loev [](http://ankari.dreamwidth.org/profile)[**ankari**](http://ankari.dreamwidth.org/)

"Hey people~"

He slams the door open and his breath almost hitches when he realizes that the room is empty, except for.

"Ah, Kasukabe-san."

"CAREFUL WITH THAT DOOR YOU IDIO-- oh, hey Madarame."

They stare at each other for a long moment before Madarame realizes that standing in the door is way too weird. "Hi, uh," he closes the door behind him and stiffly takes a seat on the nearest chair.

"What are you doing here, anyway? Shouldn't you be at work?" Kasukabe barely raises her eyes from the manga she is reading, speaking easily.

Madarame looks away, trying not to pay too much attention to the feeling of déjà vu currently invading him. "Ahh... we had a meeting and then they let me out early. I thought I'd drop by and say hi."

"Well, too bad, everyone's gone home already," Kasukabe comments, blowing smoke in the window's direction. Madarame can't help but feel disappointed at the fact that she didn't blow it in his face, because even if he would never admit it out loud, he misses the smell of her cigarettes.

"...They all went home, already?"

"Yeah, Ohno said she was going to Tanaka's to try on some new costumes, Sasayan had a job interview, and Ogipi had stuff to take care of, or something. Don't ask me about Kucchi," she turns another page, and taps her cigarette on the edge of the ashtray. It's only then that Madarame notices the monstrous amount of ashes the container is holding, and wonders exactly how long it has been since someone last emptied it.

He also notices that she didn't mention Kousaka, but decides not to comment on this.

"Oh..."

Kasukabe doesn't say a word, her full attention back on the book.

The feeling of déjà vu returns and Madarame starts thinking about how this whole situation doesn't make any sense, because it has been four months since he graduated and he has only had the chance to see Kasukabe-san a couple of times ever since. "So talking to her should be easier now, right? Because we've both been busy and we have lots of things to tell each other, about work, or classes, or the Genshiken, or..."

"You planning to stay around for a while?" Madarame's inner monologue is interrupted just in time for him to see Kasukabe pressing the open tome against the table in order to keep it open. Its poor spine.

"I..." Honestly? He has no idea. He wanted to see everyone else and catch up with things, maybe talk about the new series that is airing in the slot KujiAn left open. But now that he knows the others aren't going to come back...

"You what?" She stubs the cigarette on the ashtray impatiently. "Look, I gotta run for a quick visit to the ladies' room, but if Kousaka shows up, can you tell him I'll be right back?"

She exits the room before he can say anything, and he's left alone with his thoughts again.

So Kousaka is coming, after all, but she didn't mention him before. Maybe they had a fight and she's waiting for him to talk things over-- and, if that's the case, shouldn't he leave? Things are already awkward with just Kasukabe-san, having to sit through a discussion would only make it worse. Too bad, because he wanted to see Kousaka too and ask him if he'd beat the new 'Destiny Intimate Angels' already.

"Hey, he didn't come, did he?"

Well, that _was_ fast.

"No, he didn't," he pauses for a couple of seconds, and then adds. "Are you waiting for him?"

Kasukabe, who has already taken her place on the other chair, stares at him like he just asked the most stupid and obvious thing in the entire world.

Which okay, he did. But it's not like he was going to ask about the fight, or anything.

"Yeah? Why else would I be here?" She shrugs, lighting up another cigarette.

Madarame laughs, half-sheepishly, half-ashamed. "Hah, of course..."

"I've no idea what's taking him so long, though. We'd planned to go to his place after school, order some take out, spend time together and, _you know,_" she gestures with her hands, and promptly starts laughing. "Hell, I don't know why I'm even telling this to you! I bet I sound like a whiny wife, huh."

"N-No, not at all!" Though in reality, he does wish she had left out all of those details out. It's not like he wants, or needs to know about the things those two do in their free time.

Kasukabe picks up the book again, and resumes reading. "You look weird in a suit."

"...What?"

She glances at him briefly, with a playful smile. "Aren't you dying of asphyxia with that tie, Mr. Salary Man?"

"I'm just fine, thank you! I'm a working man now, and I have to dress formal everyday, so I'm used to it." He snaps defensively, but starts loosening the knot around his neck anyway.

Kasukabe laughs, and rolls her eyes. "Right, right, _how_ could I forget?"

Silence falls over the room shortly after, and as Madarame continues sulking, he remembers that today is the release date for the new KujiAn fighting game. He'd been really angry, because he would be at work and missing his chance to grab hold of one of the limited editions that came with a serial number and special merchandise, but it wasn't like he could skip work any... way.

At that moment, he is really glad Kasukabe isn't paying attention to him, because he's sure the expression on his face would raise more than one question from her.

Yes, the chances of Kousaka being in Akihabara this very moment, are one hundred and ten-- no, one hundred and twenty-five percent, _at least._

And the chances of Kousaka actually remembering about his date with Kasukabe-san and running back here...

"He's not even picking up, what's up with that?" Her eyes are now fixed on the cellphone's screen, and he feels horrible because he doesn't have the guts to tell her the truth. But after all, maybe he's wrong. Maybe something really came up, and Kousaka isn't at Akihabara right now. Maybe he'll get here as soon as he's free, and then Kasukabe-san and him will have their romantic evening or whatever, after all.

Or maybe not, he realizes, as the minutes turn into half an hour, an hour, an hour and a half.

By that point, Kasukabe has already finished her pack of cigarettes, cursed loudly multiple times, and paced around the table, at least forty-seven times. He has been keeping track, because he doesn't have anything else to do, and it's easier than torturing himself with the many possible scenarios that could, or could have taken place, if he had just told her about the game.

"I-- you know what? I've had enough of this!" She finally seems to acknowledge his presence in the room again. Or perhaps she is just talking to herself once more, which is very likely, considering how she just threw her purse over her shoulder and bolted outside the room. And he doesn't follow after, because she looked like she was about to cry. Possibly because of how angry she was.

Hopefully.

Madarame decides to remain in the room instead, just in case she decides to come back and.

And.

And _what_? He is fully aware that she's not planning to come back and keep on waiting for her boyfriend, and she didn't forget anything here, either, so why is it that he wants to stay there?

He gets up from his chair, and heads over to the window. he can see her jolting through the front gate, and it looks like she is definitely crying. In all the years he has known her, this is only the second time he's seen her in tears, and he doesn't like it at all. In fact, he hates it. Because they make him feel stupid, and impotent, and pathetic and just... sad.

He presses his forehead against the window glass, closes his eyes.

And he decides to wait, "just a little longer." Because, who knows? Maybe he's wrong.

Maybe she'll come back.


End file.
